When you think you can't - YOU VERY OFTEN CAN!
This is a long tale....so get a cuppa, pull up a chair and read on...I may just strike a chord and gee you up a little into action...
This is a long tale....so get a cuppa, pull up a chair and read on...I may just strike a chord and gee you up a little into action...
For the lat 2 and a half years and the dreadful Saturn return (as a Virgo how she’s been afflicted – I mean affected!!) where I feel like sometimes I’ve been to hell and back and bounced off every wall I seem to have been near, a corner has been turned.
I knew I was in for a tough ride…I wasn’t quite prepared for just how tough it would get.
However…onto the reason for this post…
For the last week or so something inside me has changed and changed in a really big way! Like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel strong, empowered and full of hell (in a nice pixieish sort of way). I have turned a huge corner in my life and somehow think that life will never quite be the same again.
OK, so my visual impairment prevents me from doing a lot in life….or does it? I thought so, but now I realise that it doesn’t. The only thing holding me back is ME! Me, myself and I. So often I have used this as an excuse as to why something was not possible and OK so driving a car with these eyes would be pretty stupid! For the safety of others more than myself, but I have ridden a horse on the open road and also a motorbike in the last year or so, NOT on the road I hasten to add),
Let me describe my vision (or what is left of it) is pretty hard. Take a pair of glasses, in the middle of the lens stick a semi transparent grey disc in the centre, then walk about the house for a bit. Try standing on a chair and closing your eyes while jumping off. Get up close to someone, about 7” away, then you can see them a little more clearly, it feels like you are a bit cross eyed, but worse than that, watch them back away as you invade their personal space. Above all else, have a conversation with someone with your eyes shut, seeing personal expressions are not something I can see. You can’t see them smile or scowl, in fact all you can see is a silhouette. Crossing the road can be a bit of a drama…risk taking is paramount, if you don’t take a (calculated) risk you don’t get to cross….anyway….you get the picture.
Anyway, I’ve been mulling over the number of excuses I can come up with for not doing or believing that I can’t do something and basically give myself a good kick up the jacksy!
My living room has needed painting for 5 years that I can think of and I did set a target to paint the whole house this year…well there comes a time when needs must. And I’ve almost finished the living room. My mum’s coming over to gloss next Thursday (bless her). Now if I painted everything white there would have been no problems at all….but this Pixie does not do white….no, no, no…. I wanted it RED! It terrified me to think of how it would all look. The thought of touching even the slightest bit of white gloss with a teeny smudge of paint and the result would be VERY obvious! Still, this Pixies not for putting off.
It’s amazing that so many things we learn in the our younger days can be of so much use later on…
And I will add here, that in my younger days I was a gymnast and worked to county champion level. I’ve also done yoga, tramp lining, a little ballet, long and short distance running…oh yeah…YAWN….
Anyway…Today, I donned a pair of jeans, got out a ladder and jumped nimbly up and down….ok, ok, so there were a few false starts and some near misses, but I realised that while I was up there I needed to exercise my ability to stay on them while looking upward. It also gave me the chance to demonstrate to my menagerie that their mother can still do bar work along a painting platform, ok, I didn’t manage a triple pike but my ability to stay upright was superb and I could tell they were impressed. I stupidly saw a mark on the ceiling and got a damp cloth to wipe it off. Just a small patch about 4” square …arrrgghhhh….bug-rit! I’ve had to wash the whole ceiling! Either that or paint it!!! Now that I CAN’T DO! All 240 square foot of it! I now know my ceiling intimately. The only near hospital visit possibility was caused by Morag who took me a little by surprise when I’m sure she moved as I was standing up.
Anyway added to the decorating I have turfed out the house, getting into nooks and crannies and throwing away the clutter like there’s no tomorrow and the studio has been part tackled too. I no longer need ‘stuff’ around me, It clutters up my life and my head, making me feel like I’m hemmed in. My mind is freer, my life seems to be getting more organised, I am achieving more, but I am also getting sillier and my creative head…well it’s nothing short of madness.
I intend to start a Creativity Coaching Group, and teach sessions at the studio. My gallery bit has been organised so that I can fit 4 people in it and don’t have to move stuff around my workspace (in another room) which iis difficult if I’m in the middle of a job. I am jumping about, singing (badly, but who cares) along to 60’s songs while decorating and yeah dancing alone too. I’m sure the cats gave me a round of applause for my performance…I must have lost a stone in weight (alright, slight exaggeration here) due to the up and down of the ladder and having ants in my pants. Above all, I want to earn a living from the thing I love the most. I am loosing my feeling of GUILT that has over ridden my ability to charge for my play. This is WHAT I do. It’s how I managed to pay my bills and it is my living.
I tell you this story, friends, not for sympathy or pats on the back. It’s to share with you the many rather lame excuses I have tripped of my tongue in the last 10 or so years have to stop.
So, what excuses do you use? What holds you back and why? Are they real or lame reasons for not wanting to do something or not having the confidence to at least try? What have you got to loose?
Remember: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade…and when you say you can’t you usually CAN! Go out and JUST DO IT! Loose the fear of being wrong, or failing, for there is no such thing as failure. Just something that although didn’t happen, gives you the wisdom or knowledge to do it differently NEXT TIME
you try.
And I suppose if you’ve read this far….you will be still wondering….just who the hell is Morag????
I knew I was in for a tough ride…I wasn’t quite prepared for just how tough it would get.
However…onto the reason for this post…
For the last week or so something inside me has changed and changed in a really big way! Like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel strong, empowered and full of hell (in a nice pixieish sort of way). I have turned a huge corner in my life and somehow think that life will never quite be the same again.
OK, so my visual impairment prevents me from doing a lot in life….or does it? I thought so, but now I realise that it doesn’t. The only thing holding me back is ME! Me, myself and I. So often I have used this as an excuse as to why something was not possible and OK so driving a car with these eyes would be pretty stupid! For the safety of others more than myself, but I have ridden a horse on the open road and also a motorbike in the last year or so, NOT on the road I hasten to add),
Let me describe my vision (or what is left of it) is pretty hard. Take a pair of glasses, in the middle of the lens stick a semi transparent grey disc in the centre, then walk about the house for a bit. Try standing on a chair and closing your eyes while jumping off. Get up close to someone, about 7” away, then you can see them a little more clearly, it feels like you are a bit cross eyed, but worse than that, watch them back away as you invade their personal space. Above all else, have a conversation with someone with your eyes shut, seeing personal expressions are not something I can see. You can’t see them smile or scowl, in fact all you can see is a silhouette. Crossing the road can be a bit of a drama…risk taking is paramount, if you don’t take a (calculated) risk you don’t get to cross….anyway….you get the picture.
Anyway, I’ve been mulling over the number of excuses I can come up with for not doing or believing that I can’t do something and basically give myself a good kick up the jacksy!
My living room has needed painting for 5 years that I can think of and I did set a target to paint the whole house this year…well there comes a time when needs must. And I’ve almost finished the living room. My mum’s coming over to gloss next Thursday (bless her). Now if I painted everything white there would have been no problems at all….but this Pixie does not do white….no, no, no…. I wanted it RED! It terrified me to think of how it would all look. The thought of touching even the slightest bit of white gloss with a teeny smudge of paint and the result would be VERY obvious! Still, this Pixies not for putting off.
It’s amazing that so many things we learn in the our younger days can be of so much use later on…
And I will add here, that in my younger days I was a gymnast and worked to county champion level. I’ve also done yoga, tramp lining, a little ballet, long and short distance running…oh yeah…YAWN….
Anyway…Today, I donned a pair of jeans, got out a ladder and jumped nimbly up and down….ok, ok, so there were a few false starts and some near misses, but I realised that while I was up there I needed to exercise my ability to stay on them while looking upward. It also gave me the chance to demonstrate to my menagerie that their mother can still do bar work along a painting platform, ok, I didn’t manage a triple pike but my ability to stay upright was superb and I could tell they were impressed. I stupidly saw a mark on the ceiling and got a damp cloth to wipe it off. Just a small patch about 4” square …arrrgghhhh….bug-rit! I’ve had to wash the whole ceiling! Either that or paint it!!! Now that I CAN’T DO! All 240 square foot of it! I now know my ceiling intimately. The only near hospital visit possibility was caused by Morag who took me a little by surprise when I’m sure she moved as I was standing up.
Anyway added to the decorating I have turfed out the house, getting into nooks and crannies and throwing away the clutter like there’s no tomorrow and the studio has been part tackled too. I no longer need ‘stuff’ around me, It clutters up my life and my head, making me feel like I’m hemmed in. My mind is freer, my life seems to be getting more organised, I am achieving more, but I am also getting sillier and my creative head…well it’s nothing short of madness.
I intend to start a Creativity Coaching Group, and teach sessions at the studio. My gallery bit has been organised so that I can fit 4 people in it and don’t have to move stuff around my workspace (in another room) which iis difficult if I’m in the middle of a job. I am jumping about, singing (badly, but who cares) along to 60’s songs while decorating and yeah dancing alone too. I’m sure the cats gave me a round of applause for my performance…I must have lost a stone in weight (alright, slight exaggeration here) due to the up and down of the ladder and having ants in my pants. Above all, I want to earn a living from the thing I love the most. I am loosing my feeling of GUILT that has over ridden my ability to charge for my play. This is WHAT I do. It’s how I managed to pay my bills and it is my living.
I tell you this story, friends, not for sympathy or pats on the back. It’s to share with you the many rather lame excuses I have tripped of my tongue in the last 10 or so years have to stop.
So, what excuses do you use? What holds you back and why? Are they real or lame reasons for not wanting to do something or not having the confidence to at least try? What have you got to loose?
Remember: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade…and when you say you can’t you usually CAN! Go out and JUST DO IT! Loose the fear of being wrong, or failing, for there is no such thing as failure. Just something that although didn’t happen, gives you the wisdom or knowledge to do it differently NEXT TIME
you try.
And I suppose if you’ve read this far….you will be still wondering….just who the hell is Morag????
Visitors to my home are well acquainted with her. She was a thirtieth birthday present from my husband…. And there goes another whole new story! And she hangs from my living room (yes VERY RED living room) ceiling and she’s flown there for almost the last 20 years (is it really THAT long). Oh just look at her, even she looks happier.
When you think you can't - YOU VERY OFTEN CAN!
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