Hints from the Gods .... and the animal kingdom!

Ok…. I admit to refusing the offer from my weekend visitor to cut the grass for me before he left (note to self – really MUST stop this independent female role!). And he telling me that men were good for some things…. Hmmmm he said with a smile on his face. Well I left it open, still needing to be convinced somewhere there, and I don’t need any shelves putting up just yet, lol.
Anyway yesterday I cut the grass. As per usual almost broke my back. I have back problems anyway, probably due to bending over with magnifiers most of my life and rounding my shoulders in the process. It’s a bit of a pain that you have to get so close to everything to see it properly….anyway bear this in mind as I tell you the rest…..


I decided while tea was cooking to go and trim the edges of the lawn with scissors. I have to use scissors because I cannot see the bottom of the edge shears as they’re too far away, rendering them useless. There I was happily snipping away around my blessing tree (a Twisted hazel) and removing the cut grass to one side. Dodger (the Chav cat from hell) sped past me at the rate of knots burping and calling as he went. Nothing unusual there either. I’ve introduced this cat to you many times. I’ve also blogged about my great fear of mice, rats, frogs, spiders and such like, in fact anything that hops, skips, jumps or runs. Now why is it that at the moment anything I say with great affirmation, seems to come back and bite me on the asse? I was bragging to said Beltane Man that my cats were pretty good and didn’t seem to catch anything….well if you discount the poor from that was got 3 times last year! I turned to my right and there it was!

Paralysed with what can only be described as mortal fear!

I quickly covered it with grass…. Although what good that would do I’ve no idea. But needed to think of a way to remove said body from lawn…. YAK YAK YAK!

I had to go in, make a cuppa and decide on my next plan of action. I avoided a stiff drink as I thought I was shaking enough. I texted said Beltane Man, expecting sympathy? A knight in shining armour (OK so he would have come but is not exactly round the corner) probably hoping for advice at the very least….result….. he laughed and said….awwww poor you, I’m sure you will deal with it….followed by, see there’s another use for me Hmph! OK OK OK! I’m starting to get the picture and more than a little synchronicity going on here!

Something then occurred….was it a mouse or a baby rat! How do I tell the difference.
Went outside, complete with gardening gloves (well you never can be too sure – could have still been alive) uncovered said furry thing took picture, covered back over and with my eyes tightly shut and on a wing and a prayer deposited it in carrier bag, then in wheelie bin.

Texted said Beltane Man again to ask the difference. (Hmmmm seems he’s becoming more useful that I thought/wanted/needed!) Beltane man tells me rats have bigger heads and I was sure it was dead wasn’t I? Because they have a great habit of playing dead! Hmmmm never looked that close and wasn’t getting it out of bin to have a look.

Now on downloading the picture and trying to look closer I’m not sure what it is. I took 3 photos all blurred. Not out of focus honest, it was my hands shaking! Now wondering of it’s a baby bird with it’s wings chewed off! And of course, Dodger is getting the blame. Blue was the only one out there at the same time and she’s far too sweet and innocent (NOT!), but I do put my money on Dodger!
If you don’t know about him here’s a mini profile…
He’s a bit of a lad. Thinks he’s my husband/God/ Partner/child…. Amongst other things and does a pretty good job of snubbing people who come into the house….ESPECIALLY MEN! It’s took Sue 6 months to even get anywhere near stroking him and this is at arms length and without eye contact. He’s a great protector of my house, providing the trouble is outside, he charges at the window growling like a lion….providing they are OUTSIDE! Anyone coming in and he’s off like a shot. He really doesn’t care for men and they know that in his eyes HE is number one and they just have to accept that, where I’m concerned, he is the main geezer. I came downstairs at the weekend to see the said husband, curled contentedly on said Beltane Mans lap!!!! For God’s sake whats happening round here! This cat accepts no one, let alone a potential male threat!

And added to that Blue thinks said Beltane mans God's gift and he's pretty stuck on her too....but there again she is a bit of a man magnet and will go to anything in trousers. Sugar, el dinosaur lady also won't leave him alone and I feel like I'm running out of support round here!

Oh yeah...some pictures of Dodge...... Here he is ruining a whole bin of woodbased cat litter! The bin is used to store the litter prior to use, but swells immensely once used, rendering it useless....

Not me, not doing anything.... just sat in here watching flies....honest!

Whos the Daddy! Extreme running is my favourite hobby....well along with abseiling!

This is me, heavily disguised as the settee throw.....
Oh yeah and me camouflaging myself as her slippers.....

And when all else fails....wrap yourself up as a christmas present....it never fails!

Joking aside, I must admit that out of all the cats I've ever had or fostered, it's a bit unnerving at times as to how human he is! Most other cats are happy being cats, but I'm not sure he knows he is one! He's a real character and I often think of this poem when referring to him.....

Macavity - The Mystery Cata poem by T S Eliot


Macavity's a Mystery Cat:

he's called the Hidden Paw--

For he's the master criminal

who can defy the Law.

He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard,

the Flying Squad's despair

:For when they reach the scene of crime--

Macavity's not there!

To read the rest of the poem CLICK HERE